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It’s not unusual for new ideas for musings to flood my mind whilst I’m out pounding up or around the mountain trails. Which is exactly what happened on Sunday.
I was gracefully (lol) loping along a fairly easy path and found myself pondering the idea of what showing up authentically really means. It’s been a path I’ve been traversing for a few years now (the idea, not the mountain). Familiar territory.
And I know that for me to allow myself to be authentic, I first and foremost need to truly KNOW myself.
Now I know what you’re probably thinking: how can you not know yourself when you spend every waking moment in your own company..?
But let’s be really honest:
How often do we say what we really want to?
How often do we behave in alignment with our values?
I can honestly confess that in the first 3+ decades of my existence, my answer to both of those questions was hardly ever..
Yup, by choice.
Because back then I didn’t believe my opinion really had much value.
I also didn’t hold much in the form of self-love.
Worthiness? That was to be earned and validated by those around me. Continuously.
Yup, back then that was my truth.
I’m not quite sure when I got tired of that. I just know that at some point in my early 40’s my perspective changed.
Being what other’s needed me to be started feeling like shoes that don’t fit anymore. Uncomfortable.
Saying words that were no longer in alignment with my beliefs and values became arduous.
And so began my journey to finally starting to really KNOW ME.
Because each and every time speaking my truth “upset” another, I silently fought the urge to apologise. To soothe them. Make myself small again..
And woah, that urge was strong..
But, as with anything, practice makes perfect. Which meant knowingly putting myself in the face of potential conflict. Standing firm. Allowing others to speak their truths, even when those truths directly conflicted with mine.
Perhaps my biggest learning along this path, has been my shift towards appreciating the gargantuan role that discomfort plays. Accepting just how important it is to allow ourselves to FEEL the emotionally painful stuff.
Because THAT’S where we truly get to know ourselves.
As we consciously sit in the proverbial puddle of mud, accepting and anticipating the value we know will eventually show itself, we start to understand exactly what we’re capable of.
Just how LIMITLESS we actually are.
So, my point here today is this:
Each and every “bump” along the road we traverse, HAS VALUE.
When we’re stretched outside of what we comfortably know, we learn that we’re capable of SO MUCH MORE.
Yup, those “bumps” are GOLD.
So go ahead.
RIDE the bump.
Push yourself in ways you’ve never previously considered.
Because you can.
Because we all deserve to truly KNOW OURSELVES.