Are We Hooked On Feeling Offended?
Each and every day I’m reminded how we as a society are generally governed by what other people think.
Yup, me too at times..
It’s the only reason we ever bother to feel offended by someone else’s words/opinions/actions.
Think about it…
The ONLY time we ever take anything personally is when we’re looking outside of ourselves for some form of validation.
When we think that another’s opinion MEANS something about who we are.
And it doesn’t. Ever.
My biggest teachers in this particular department are my daughter and my role as a mom.
Sometimes just the way she looks at me can send me off into my little world of self-doubt and loathing.
But before you start thinking that she’s a cold hearted git with a Medusa stare, she isn’t. Not at all.
In fact, those poor-me moments are NEVER about her or where she’s at.
Nope, they’re about me. And where I’M at.
And how I choose to interpret her interactions with me.
Because I only ever reach for validation when I’m feeling crappy. When my emotional state is low. That’s when my doubts and fears around my mom-abilities loom large.
Conversely, when I’m rocking my mood I’m confident and cool. I feel good about me so any sideways glance from her would be simply that: a sideways glance. End of story.
Our MOOD determines how we perceive things.
That’s a fact.
And I can guarantee that if your mood is elevated, the concept of “feeling offended” simply wouldn’t show up.
Don’t believe me? Try it…
Next time you notice feeling offended by something or someone, step back and do a quick mood check (and be brutally honest with yourself).
On a scale of 1 – 10 (where 1 = suicidal and 10 = bliss) where do you lie?
NO-ONE can offend us. Ever.
It’s ALWAYS our perception of the situation that creates that feeling.
Yup, feeling offended is our CHOICE! Own It!
If we judge feedback as wrong, well, then we’ll feel offended.
If we judge it as right, then it’s simply interesting.
Which feels better?